Originally posted February 21, 2010
Through a series of events that would have made Rube Goldberg's head spin like the face of a Rubik's Cube¹, the company I [used to] work for recently acquired a medium-sized manufacturing facility in a nearby state. It didn't take long for the rumor mill to start churning, and speculation reached a peak while the entire management team was attending a several-day party site visit.
I overheard some coworkers discussing a copy of a newspaper clipping that had been left on the table in the kitchen. The article said the entire manufacturing facility would be relocated to a currently unoccupied building less than a mile from our office. It even quoted an "anonymous executive" who, given the particular phrasing, could only be my boss.
This would be a good time to mention that I emailed a copy of the article to one of our VPs, someone who's known me for over 10 years. I included the explicit instructions DO NOT FORWARD.
The newspaper story notwithstanding, there was no reason to move the manufacturing facility, which had been family-owned and employs hundreds of people in the area, several hundred miles away and across state lines. The relocation itself would be terribly costly, and many skilled and experienced personnel would be lost in the process. It just wouldn't make sense.
I learned from this that it's possible to interpret "DO NOT FORWARD" to mean "show this immediately to our Marketing Director," who, of course, lost no time in grabbing a phone to call the newspaper to demand a retraction. Halfway through dialing, however, she realized it would be prudent to verify the story before taking action.²
Back at the office we were discussing the article. I explained why the relocation wouldn't make sense, and that I was sure it wasn't going to happen. There was some resistance from my coworkers. After all, there it was. In print. In a newspaper. "How can you be so sure?" they asked. But my reply left no room for doubt: "Because I wrote it before I left for work this morning."
I wonder where (or if) I'd be working today if that phone call had gone through.
¹This may very well be the worst imagery I've ever used. Ever. We're talking Bulwer-Lytton quality, folks.
²Actually, as our Marketing Director told me later, her exact thought was, "This came from Adam? I'd better check it out for myself."
